Cheryl Shops

America's Next Top Model recap
So, as you know, last night was the premiere of America's Next Top Model, and instead of jumping right into the competition, they went all American Idol on us and showed the 32 girls chosen to go to L.A., who were then narrowed down to 20 semifinalists, then to 14 finalists (who will actually compete on the show). Of course, there was a lot of craziness going down: a bar fight; Eve (a 19-year-old finalist from L.A.) hating on pretty much everyone, including an obviously anorexic contestant (who got cut); Amanda, one of the finalists, admitting she's legally blind and will be totally so in five years; lots of crying; and on and on. Now, while there's no clear Shandi (who was my favorite last year from the first episode on), there are definitely girls with potential. So, here's my super-OCD girl-by-girl analysis.

Amanda: She has totally goregous eyes...but she can't see out of them so well (she's the blind one). I also have a feeling her age (25) and the fact that she has a two-year-old son will work against her. Which is too bad, because she seems like she has her shit together.

Ann: An all-American athlete, she seems pretty good-natured and relaxed, and she kind of reminds me of Adrienne, the winner of the first ANTM. I don't know whether that's a good or bad thing (so far, Adrienne doesn't have much of a career).

Cassie: A 19-year-old Oklahoman who's stripping to pay for her education, she doesn't seem very stripper-y (i.e., no ginormous fake boobs). But I have a feeling her occupation is going to work against her at some point. Then again, Anna Nicole Smith started out as a stripper...

Eva: Definitely a feisty one, she looks like Jenascia from last season and, like Jenascia, is also Kate Moss short: 5' 7". While she's pretty, I think her looks, her attitude, or both are going to get in the way.

Jennipher: Dumb spelling aside, Jennipher is pretty, but she didn't make much of an impression on me--which isn't a good sign. Also, I bet Janice Dickinson is going to be on her ass to lose some weight (hey, don't shoot the messenger--models need to fit into sample sizes).

Julie: Obviously, this season, Tyra is trying to make the show more multicultural, and Julie is the show's first contestant of Indian descent. I think she's really beautiful though, and the fact that she names Spaceballs as one of her favorite movies is pretty fucking awesome.

Kelle: The "white black girl", Kelle has a great body and beautiful skin. But so far, not much personality.

Kristi: Ah, yes, the Republican. If she doesn't totally annoy everyone first, I have a feeling she'll get the boot for looking "too commercial."

Leah: This Catholic girl from Oklahoma said she had no problem with nudity ("Nude me up!"), but she's 24, which is definitely middle-aged in the modeling world.

Magdalena: She photographs okay, but I'm not too impressed. The French would call her jolie-laide; I'd call her kind of fugly.

Nicole: This "former punk" North Dakotan basically admitted to the judges that she's bisexual, especially under the influence of alcohol. Interesting. The fact that she lists Maxim as one of her favorite magazines makes me a bit suspicious, however.

Norelle: This girl is my favorite thus far. She's young (20) and definitely has the body for modeling. She has braces, too, but they're coming off "soon." And she said that she loves Paris Hilton...well, like I said, she's young.

Toccara: A.k.a., the plus-size girl. There's always one per show, but, hey, let's face it, she's not going to win. In fact, I don't think it's even fair to make one plus-size girl compete with 13 "regular" models (granted, "America's Next Top Plus-Size Model" doesn't quite have the same ring, does it?)--we all know that as soon as Toccara tries to stuff her "200 in the trunk, what?" badonk-a-donk into a couture gown, she's outta there.

Yaya: I think Yaya is awesome and everyone is going to love her, because she seems really sweet (a la Mercedes from last season) and she's frickin' smart (goes to Brown, speaks three languages). Her skin is a bit on the broken-out side, but that's nothing a little chemical peel can't fix. Also, she's gorgeous.

So I'm gunning Norelle and Yaya. Of course, after next week's episode, when they actually start modeling, this all could change. But those are my early favorites. Also, feel free to discuss in the "comments" section at the bottom of this post.